Saturday, January 9, 2016

Loving a Birthfamily

Just before Christmas we got an e-mail letting us know that packages for Christmas would be late.  Birthbrother was in the hospital with a kidney infection.  Baby Girl kept worrying about his ear infection in his back.  She was highly confused but still very worried.  A few days latter when I e-mailed letting them know that my late package for Christmas had been sent they informed me that he was in a medically induced coma and that he had pneumonia.  What a hard time of year to be in the hospital.

A few days ago I tried to figure out what unit he was on in the hospital so I could send something from the gift shop and wasn't able to figure out what unit he was on.  So I e-mailed them looking to find out if he had discharged from the hospital.  Unfortunately I got an e-mail back today saying that he was still in the hospital.

Included in that same e-mail was an unfortunate fact.  D is back in jail.  I can't imagine that forgetting to tell us really occurred but maybe rather they hoped that she would be released again on conditions.  No such luck.  She was arrested just before Christmas stealing and will be in jail on violation of parole.

I e-mailed back telling them that they had a lot on their plate and that we are thinking of them all.  We sent love, hugs and hope that all of this passes quickly for them.  We are privy to information as they are willing to share it.  Our connection is one that will last forever but the guard that makes us not fully family will mean that we don't always get a full story.  I didn't ask at this point what this means for our yearly visit.  My plan is the same as always.  To offer the visit and those that are available we will visit with.  This year though if she is in jail will be harder since Baby Girl will need to know that D won't be available.  My eye's are welled up just thinking about that prospect that the reality that Baby Girl will soon understand that her Birthmom has made bad choices repetitively in her life- and that is the real reason she couldn't parent- anyone.

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