Back in the Saddle Again

So we are two timing again.  Thursday afternoon we met with our adoption agency and discussed foster to adopt as well as domestic infant adoption.  DH determined that he does not want to do foster care.  He was willing to learn about it (though both of us due to our jobs already are very informed about they system locally).  We compromised and he agreed that we would not seek a placement via foster care however once our children (yes children) are in middle school he is willing to do respite care for foster care.

Friday we went to a hospital a little over an hour away from home to get a second opinion on our infertility.  Like the original hospital the new doctor felt that DH's motility is poor and there is a chance for antibodies.  She was surprised that the other clinic actually went forward with IUI given the poor washing of the sperm.  For me she was concerned about my thyroid.  My levels are borderline and she indicated that newer research in the past year that has come out would indicate that if my thyroid results are the same today as they were three years ago that I should be treated.  Monday DH goes in for a sperm analysis to determine what we never tested for before: antibodies.  They also will try a different washing technique to see if IUI is even feasible.  I will have blood work done in the next few weeks to test my thyroid as well as have an ultrasound.  We will then meet back and discuss the results.  She wanted to know what our plans were and I was blunt with her saying that I realized that they were in the business of getting women pregnant however first and foremost I want answers.  Second I want data that supports any treatment that we would potentially try.  I ended by telling her that the data had to be strong since adoption is 100% successful*.

Today the packet to update our homestudy came in the mail.  I corrected the initial report and filled out all the forms.  We need doctors appointments, finger prints, copies of birth certificates, marriage license, checks (of course), three letters of recommendation and we need to get started back on a portfolio.  The process though a little less intense since much of the paper work is done seemed like a breeze.  Tonight I had a few "what are we doing" thoughts when I was paying bills, but reality is we have more in savings now then we did when we started the process last time.

In moments of doubt I then think back to an off the cuff conversation I had with DH a few weeks back which I think started the ball rolling again.  We were in the car driving to pick blueberries with Baby Girl when I asked him "If fertility was not an issue for us- Would we be having a second child."  He said "yes." and the conversation ended.

So no matter where these roads take us I'm ready for Baby2.  We already have a cute idea of how we will announce our waiting for Baby2.  I'm excited.  I'm ready for a wait- I'm in no rush and now know the feeling of when its "right."

*There is a chance for a failed adoption and no baby is "guaranteed" but if a family is willing to wait until a match goes into finalization adoption has a 100% success rate.